Anime Abominations (Part 5) – Shadow Skill: Secret of the Kurudan Style

Having never seen anything from the Shadow Skill anime series or read any of the manga, I admit that I didn’t understand much of Shadow Skill: Secret of the Kurudan Style (2004). This 60-minute movie features Elle and Gau, who must stop a bad guy from obtaining knowledge of an ancient fighting style and taking over the world with it.

I recently watched a video on the use of CG in anime series. In the creator’s opinion, CG doesn’t typically work because, in 2D-3D hybrid shows, 3D elements clash with the 2D assets, and, in shows made entirely or mostly with CG, the 3D elements mimic 2D animation with cell shading, lowered frame rates, and severely limited and stiff movement, which presents CG as a bad rip-off of 2D animation as opposed to its own type of animation. I don’t watch a lot of CGI anime series, so I’d never noticed this myself. Most of the series in these Anime Abominations blogs have their own styles that, while they look horrible and are inspired by traditional Japanese animation, don’t limit the animation or art in this way.

Shadow Skill was the first time I witnessed this extent of 2D-animation mimicry. It kind of reminded me of Tokusatsu movies and television shows, which often feature live-action actors mimicking the exaggerated drama and flamboyance of anime in a charming and delightfully cheesy way. Shadow Skill, however, doesn’t mimic anything that makes anime fun to watch. In fact, it mimics the worst that anime has to offer. Most of the movie contains long, monotonous dialog in which the characters hardly move; badly choreographed fights with characters that swipe at the camera and then fall over; and abstract flashbacks… No, not even flashbacks, one flashback that is repeated over and over again. Not even talking about the CG anymore, the pacing is just awful. This 20-minute episode lasts three times longer than it should.

Anyway, if this description isn’t all of Shadow Skill that you want to experience… enjoy?

Anime Abominations (Part 4) – Catblue Dynamite

Catblue Dynamite (2006) is a single episode, 40-minute anime written and directed by Romanov Higa, the creator of other such CGI anime as Urda: The Third Reich. While attempting to shake her associate Bill for money he owes her, Blue, a part cat, part human hybrid, instead finds herself defending him from a group of mysterious masked thugs, who want something ridiculous, a Frank Sinatra tape that Bill recently came to possess.

Among its many ridiculous features, Blue wields pistols, swords, and pipes with her cat tail; fights upside down while hanging from her cat tail; fights to the accompaniment of disco music… and talks to ghosts. Because psychic cats?

Anime Abominations (Part 3) – Funny Pets

Funny Pets is a 12-episode series of six-minute short films that aired in 2006. According to its description, Funny Pets is about two aliens named Crescent and Corona who must adjust to life as pets of the airheaded showgirl Funny. Watching this series, however, you probably won’t pick up on most of that. This show is bizarre, and while the characters grunt and squeak, they don’t have dialog. Each episode is self-contained and most of the time ends with one or more characters dead because they accidentally killed themselves or one another. What’s amazing about this show is that even though the characters do completely stupid and bizarre things with no verbal explanation, you’re never really lost as to why they’re behaving the way they are. While it’s not the most entertaining or the best looking show out there, it has some great visual storytelling. You can find all twelve episodes on YouTube.

Anime Abominations (Part 2) – Abunai Sisters: Koko & Mika

Abunai Sisters: Koko & Mika was a series of ten CG-animated short films intended to promote celebrity models Kyoko and Mika Kano. Unfortunately, the show was so bad that it was canceled after the first two episodes aired and all the DVDs were burned (one wishes). Supposedly, only the two episodes that aired can be found online, and while DVDs exist, they are expensive. Its rarity is quite impressive, considering that it was produced in 2009. You can read more about it here.

Anime Abominations (Part 1) – Urda: The Third Reich

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ny-y9DBs9GM&list=PL6A3BD74B6DC0A7DE&index=1

I was at Sakuracon last April and was surprised to find among the fan panels Anime Abominations, an overview of some of the worst CGI series from Japan hosted by Jarvis Gray. Being a connoisseur of terrible CGI movies, I absolutely had to see this panel, and I wasn’t disappointed. It was by far my favorite event of Sakuracon 2016.

I thought I would share some of the series from the panel over the next few weeks. First is Urda: The Third Reich, a series of five, five-minute episodes about Nazis, time travel, and ridiculous action (for example, straightening a falling tank in mid-air by kicking a brick wall).